EXPRESS READ: WHY FRANK AND WILMA LOVE THEIR LIVES

Six years ago, after multiple relapses, Frank and Wilma Gie finally broke free of a lifetime’s heavy drug addiction. ‘I never used to be a hugger,’ says Frank. ‘Today, the greens are greener, the blues are bluer.’ Says Wilma: ‘I’m so excited about the future.’ The couple are now involved in a programme that houses and mentors people in recovery from addiction| Photo: Leentjie du Preez

Wilma (52) is the second of three children born to a financial manager father and teacher mother. She attended Hoërskool Alberton, has two adult sons and lives with her husband Frank in Cape Town’s Woodstock. She works full-time doing admin for Freedom Church 

Despite a great childhood and having loved church with my parents, I was rebellious.  From a young age, I sneaked out of the house to go to clubs, and got caught up in a heavily sexual lifestyle.

Trying to escape that, I married a lovely man named Christoff when I was 20. We had two boys soon afterwards, but when we moved to Cape Town I left him for a woman who paid me a lot of attention. Christoff got custody, but graciously let me see the boys almost daily, to help them with homework and put them to bed.

My new relationship also ended and, following the break-up, I took ecstasy at the encouragement of a friend. I thought I could handle taking drugs every now and then, but they took my feet out from under me. For the next 10 years, everything just spiralled and it was a very dark time. Throughout everything, I knew God was there. It was sometimes hard to think about Him because I felt ashamed, but there was always a tinge of hope.

By 2009 I was desperate and asked my parents for help. They organised rehab for me, which is where I met Frank. We married very quickly but unfortunately then both relapsed and went through nine more years of addiction. I disappeared from my children for two years.

By 2013 Frank and I had nothing. For five years we lived in an abandoned garage. At times I fantasised about dying, believing it would be so much better. But, together, we started praying to God for some kind of deliverance from our situation.

To make money, I painted pictures that Frank sold door to door. One day, Frank sold one to a guy called Kevin who was part of a church in Woodstock called Freedom Church. Kevin invited us to one of its groups. We went, and were so loved by the people there, who we got to know and love.

despair

After a few months, the leaders started fundraising for us to go to rehab. We were excited, but drug use had programmed me to need instant solutions. As I waited for rehab, despair got hold of me. I saw a train coming along the railway line near where we lived and I thought, ‘I can’t anymore’. I ran towards it and Frank had to rugby tackle me to stop me jumping in front of it.

But finally, in 2019, we were able to go to rehab. It was very hard but, believe it or not, when we came out we had no cravings, just as our church had prayed. It’s hard to believe, but even Frank didn’t have them, despite having been on heroin for 20 years.

I now work full-time at Freedom Church, doing book-keeping and admin, and Frank and I both volunteer in children’s leadership there. A couple at church, Luke and Jasmina, recently set up the Quiver Foundation which will, among other things, mentor people to a sustainable life after addiction. They have invited us to be ‘house parents’ to people in recovery from addiction as they reintegrate into society, and we plan to love these people with the love that God has poured into our hearts.

Frank and Wilma will live in this building in Cape Town’s Woodstock, part of the Quiver Foundation, where they will help people in recovery from addiction reintegrate into society. With them is Luke, co-founder of the Quiver Foundation | Photo: Leentjie du Preez

We’ve both reconciled to a great extent with our families, which is enormous. I have apologised deeply to my boys, who are now 31 and 27. It saddens me so much that I wasn’t there for them. Reconciliation is still an ongoing journey with my elder son, who was traumatised when I disappeared for those two years. All I can do is show him I really have changed, not through my words – which were not reliable in the past – but by the fruit I bear now and in the future.

I also regret that I didn’t get into a relationship with God sooner. Nonetheless, today I say, Thank you, Lord.’ I’m so full of gratitude and excited about the future. I love my life!”

Frank (51) grew up in George and attended York High School. His parents divorced when he was young and he was brought up by his dad, a steel merchant, and his step-mom, a school secretary

I think I felt worthless growing up because I only met my biological mom, who had multiple marriages, when I was 24 and our relationship didn’t really develop from there.

I started drinking heavily, using cannabis and experimenting with party drugs after leaving school, not to feel good, but because I was in self-destruct mode. I dropped out of studying electrical engineering at Cape Technikon in my first year and most of my adult life from then on is hazy, as I became a full-blown tik [crystal meth] and heroin addict.

By 2008 I was living on the streets in George, and one day I met some Christian evangelists on the streets who prayed for me and even took me to a rehab on a farm. I relapsed a week after coming out, but I recall actually feeling the touch of God and His forgiveness for the life I’d been living. I’d grown up without much exposure to the Bible, but somehow had a sense of God. This was really the first time in my life I’d encountered Jesus.

A year later, at a second rehab, I prayed for a wife: quite a bold prayer as any responsibility was a big thing for me. And then I saw Wilma. It was weird, I told my friend that I felt I knew her, even though I’d never seen her before.

Frank and Wilma greet homeless people with addiction problems, who they are intent on helping just as they were helped. ‘Sometimes we were so high we couldn’t even hold a conversation, but the church just showed us love for who we were,’ says Frank | Photo: Leentjie du Preez

It was only after five years of living in that garage that we realised we were completely broken and had nothing else but Jesus. We started crying out to Him, listened to CCFM Radio, read the Bible, worshipped, painted scriptures on the walls and told our dealers, ‘Watch this space. Jesus is going to deliver us.’

When we joined Freedom Church we went to every event, every prayer session, every group. Sometimes we were so high we couldn’t even hold a conversation, but the church just showed us love for who we were. They didn’t agree with what we were doing, but they still loved us. They organised the fundraiser to pay for our rehab, the paperwork, the social worker, the doctor. Every now and again they would take our filthy clothes and wash them and get us some groceries. And they encouraged us and prayed with us.

Throwback: Frank and Wilma shortly after they had received a life-changing  invitation from Kevin (left), pictured here with his wife Naomi. Later Kevin told them he’d felt a specific prompting to invite them, that he believes was from God

Withdrawing from heroin is like this: take the worst flu you’ve ever had – body aches, diarrhoea, stomach cramps, fever – and multiply that by a thousand. I didn’t sleep for about two weeks but we both got through it. When we stepped out of rehab, the blues were bluer, the greens were greener, we were sober, we were clean and life was just totally different. It was so great and we somehow knew we’d been delivered from addiction not just physically but spiritually.

At times I thought there was no way I could reconcile with my parents because of what I’d done, but Father is a God of reconciliation. Addicts will always promise that things won’t happen again, so we don’t promise those we love anything. We just say, watch our lifestyle and see if it bears the fruit of God’s Holy Spirit.

To anyone addicted, I would say Jesus is bigger than addiction, anxiety and depression. Don’t give up, there’s a better life out there.

Today when I feel concerns I give them to Jesus because he’s the one who took us out of the pits. I was on heroin for 20 years and on drugs for 30 years so, if I can trust him to deliver me from that darkness, how much more will he be able to do in my life?”

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